Leave it to your boy Cosmo to come up with the new series to keep you straight in these crazy times of politics, parallel universes, hotdogs and whatnot. He told me and C'mish he was gonna write some shit up, but I had no idea how thorough it would be - so next level! so anyway, without further ado -- here is the debut edition of

What's good, people? It's your boy Cosmo Baker coming back to drop a gem on you with this new series called "Role Model Of The Week." You know, this is a wild and crazy world that we all live in, and things sure do seem to get rough and tough out there. It's kind of hard to figure out what the do, where to go, and how to act sometimes, especially for the seeds out there (who are the ones that need our guidance the most - they are the future.) So with the feature I'm just trying to shed some light on human beings, animals and other things that are doing it real big on the tip of the type of shit that you need to be getting your levels up on. Self-empowerment, internal realization, power of refinement, that's what we all should strive for ever day and passing these (and other) lessons off to the seeds is just one of the things that is my life's work. Just ask the dudes at The Lab - I'm always dropping knowledge when I come through on my monthly "enthusiasm workshops." My repertoire isn't limited to push-up reps or having breakdance clinics to Brass Construction.

So anyway let me talk about this week's role model: Dolph "Wrecking Shop" Lundgren.

First of all, I always thought this dude was a German, but he's not, he's Swedish. That's cool with me. Secondly he's a big motherfucker - I mean we all could see that when he played Ivan Drago and went up against Rocky. But on the real, let me get deep on this Dolph Lundgren tip for a second. I always thought that dude was just another big motherfucker that was supposed to be an Arnold clone. I'm gonna put it this way - Arnold may be the Governor of California but I don't think he's that bright. But when I went to do the knowledge on Dolph here I found all sorts of ill things about the boy. First of all, dude is a graduate of the prestigious Royal Institute Of Technology. After dude graduated he went and got a masters degree in chemical engineering from the University Of Sydney, after which he was awarded a motherfucking Fullbright Scholarship to M.I.T. Doing it fucking BIG.

But the thing is, Dolph decided that he had enough schooling and wanted to become an actor - and that decision was the right one because check it, he became one of the biggest and best of his generation. "Universal Soldier," "The Punisher," "Rocky 4" - the list goes on and on. I mean fucking for real, this dude IS HE-MAN.

Off screen dude is as ill as he was on screen too. He was in the Swedish equivalent of the Navy SEALS, so he'll fucking do some real damage. He's a black belt in Kyokushin Karate, and he not only was the captain of the Swedish Karate team but he won the European and Australian tournaments, as well as placing high in the world tournament. Dolph also was the Swedish team leader for the Olympic Games in his event, the Modern Pentathalon (which is a sport that he actively still promotes. That shit seems tough.) He gets in shape and does his physical fitness. Also THIS motherfucker speaks English, Swedish, French, German, Spanish, some Japanese and Italian. Illmatic.

PS: Dolph got a strange power over the ladies. It's interesting, don't know what that's about but I won't deny it.

So yeah, Dolph is no joke. Also peep game - dude went out with Grace Jones for a while which is a trip. I mean, you know, who knows, that's a look right there and all. So yeah, DOLPH LUNDGEN is this week's ROLE MODEL OF THE WEEK, which means that he's a dude who's LEVEL YOU WANT TO GET UP ON.

So tune in next week when I bring you the next installment of COSMO BAKER'S ROLE MODEL OF THE WEEK. Until then, stay focused and keep your levels correct. 100,000!

DOLPH GOT STYLE

He's a good actor (but you know, USA #1!)