Hey dudes, Jasper is wrong as usual. Or, more accurately, he's kind of incorrect.

Michna and I are sharing a tiddlywinks set at Lit in the upstairs tonight for like an hour but it's bush league. The Metal on Metal party will be Friday, May 19 at Lit in the DOWNSTAIRS.

By the way, you know how people say "BTW" instead of saying "by the way"? I figured that that is totally dumb because when you say "by the way" you're only saying three syllables, whereas when you say "btw" that's actually five. So I came up with the gayest thing of all time, saying "beets dubs" when you want to say "btw". That way, you're only saying 2 syllables, and also maximize your gayness. Beets dubs, I'm also into using "gay" as a positive, empowering adjective.